legacy

Daily writing prompt

What is the legacy you want to leave behind?

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this is a really great question, I think about it often. when I am gone I want to leave my art behind, a few years ago I had a dream, I wanted to make greeting cards to bring joy to other people even if they are far away. I started painting those cards and give them away. Very soon I learned that it’s a time consuming and labor intensive thing I got myself into. So I chose four images, scanned them and printed them out as greeting cards. It all started in 2015, now I have my online store and a few brick and mortar stores that carry my cards in Colorado and Oregon.

this legacy is very important to me. it makes me feel like I achieved something more than just teaching English to high school students, this legacy gives a lot better outlet to my creativity. I am very happy I have it since some days are not fun, and some people are just toxic but it’s not what defines me as a person, I have my art cards for a rainy day. they lift me up when conditions around me are all cooperating to bring me down. it’s my lucky charm. Do you have a lucky charm?

morning

Daily writing prompt

When do you feel most productive?

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My daily bread

i feel most productive in the morning , I made bread this a.m., it always feels good to start it right. after a good night of sleep my body and my mind are ready for work, if work doesn’t happen I feel discouraged. work helps me feel better about myself, it brings sense of achievement in my daily routine.

some people feel productive in the evenings, I don’t know how it is even possible. owls hate morning with all the expectations to start the day right. it’s always so strange to me, looks like we humans should have more in common. we all want to produce something wonderful and unique. life is too short to sit around and wait for the sun go down.

having a deadline can motivate us sometimes, other times it’s just a source of stress. working in a team can be a positive or a negative kicker, I feel most productive when working in a good team with people I respect. productivity should be predictable and planned, if you can manage your morning routine you can manage your life. I’m still working on it optimistically, wish me luck!

decisions, decisions…

Daily writing prompt

Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow.

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decisions we make can only be judged later, maybe in fifty to sixty years, I was just kidding… bad decisions are usually the ones that make you learn, and grow… I have made plenty of those, haha can’t take it seriously any more, life is too short to regret all the bad decisions that made me learn, and grow.

the most fascinating realization is not about decisions per se but rather about our attitude towards them. bad decisions help us learn to laugh about those really terrible ones that we never discuss with anyone, even with ourselves.

i own my badly made choices, I’m not going to cry over them or lose my sleep. there is that gambling on a chance that maybe next time I’ll be smarter, maybe, I can’t promise anything.

roughly speaking I have about forty more years for making bad decisions to learn from those. it’s all about education, don’t you think? this is why they call it school of life.

changes

Daily writing prompt

Describe one positive change you have made in your life.

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change is a very important aspect of development and growth, it can be painful sometimes but in the long run it’s great to shake things up for a new perspective and a new beginning. every fall the nature dies and every spring life starts all over again, sometimes it feels this way with accepting and welcoming change.

one change I made was very hard for me, and if you never talk to me again, I will understand. I decided to be an optimist, it feels so strange, trust me, it’s just too weird to be viewing the world thru this lens. if something awful happens I choose to see it as a way for a better reality. things happen all the time but it’s not supposed to shake your world to the core. optimism is the lens that distorts the reality making it look okay, acceptable at least.

it’s kind of the filter you use to look at your own pictures. realistic views don’t really matter because they aren’t making anyone happy. in the midst of the war and depression you choose to be okay, it’s not like you don’t care about those in need, you just realize that life goes on and leave it all in God’s hands.

it may seen selfish at first, and also oblivious in a way yet it might be the only way to keep sane any more. You know what I’m talking about? sanity is a luxury these days, but we have to be able to afford it. change is good, change is healthy.

the hardest thing ever is to try and resist change, as if it could help anything. say in the fall you go, no, keep blooming my little tree, I will provide for you throughout the winter. believe it or not, this is what we do often times trying to go back in time and be twenty again, or fix the relationships that are long gone, time to move on, no looking back…

dwelling on the past is stagnation, soon you get yourself in the funk and feel lethargic. I’m sure you’ve been there and done that, not fun. moving forward is what you need to consider here and now. the world is your oyster.

what i learned in my teens

Daily writing prompt

Describe something you learned in high school.

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in high school i learned that i hated chemistry, maybe because there was no chemistry with any boys who liked me or with those who i liked. it was so heart breaking.

in tenth grade i learned i was so uncool that we would get together with my friend, same first name, two nerdy A students, and lament the fact that we were single and smart. we both lived in a bad part of town and had difficult relationship with controlling mom. she would come stay at my place when her mom went ballistic, and when my mom was going nuts i would come with my little sister to hang out with her. often times we would stay longer after school and cry at the bus stop, where we always split ways to go home. it was so touching and so real.

in eleventh grade i learned that i didn’t have to stay lonely and miserable because i entered college in March while still finishing high school. it was so liberating to know i will break free, life will not be the same. it was the best thing ever.

in high school i learned that you don’t have to be smart or beautiful to reach the stars, you just have to be lucky. i was so lucky, i didn’t fully realize it then. i learned that i loved English and this love guided me for years, even today 25 years later … perfect love…